Saturday, November 26, 2005

Holidays are always hard for me. I manage to have a good time with whomever we are spending them with, but I always miss my family. This year it hit me as I was cleaning off the table. Tiny tears welled up in the corners of my eyes. It wasn't so much because I miss them although I do more than I can say. It was the thought of them having Thanksgiving dinner at Golden Coral. My mom and sister had to work so my Grandpa decided that they shouldn't have to cook and took everyone out. It was a sweet gesture, but one they all were a little disapointed with. I could hear it in their voices when I called to wish them a happy Thanksgiving. I felt guilty when my grandpa asked me what we were making. I explained our meal in the least amount of detail possible to help myself feel better. I told them that next year I will be comming out for Thanksgiving so that I can teach them how it's done. Apparently in my absence, they have forgotten what they are supposed to do on holidays. There is a tiny seed of hope that we might be able to be there for Christmas, but I don't want to foster it yet. I can't handle the disapointment.


aola said...

you are the kind of sister my sister was. She was the glue that held our family together and when she was gone the family fell apart. We are no longer family, just scattered people living their own lives.

R said...


I'm in the opposite boat. My family knows how to do Holidays -- Nate's must be rounded up at gun point and forced to partake. Either way it hurts. I hope you get to have a nice visit with yours soon.